"Marathon Pride" - Theme from the Goofy Challenge

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"Marathon Pride" - Theme from the Goofy Challenge

Tnova
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This post was updated on .
Marathon Pride
by Joe Terranova
(Parody of "American Pie" by Don McLean)


A long, long time ago I can still remember when those long runs used to make me smile
And I knew if I put in the time
That I could make those Kenyans whine
And maybe they'd be nervous for a while.

But that December made me shiver
With every long run I would quiver,
SiraGU's on my door step,
I wouldn't take one more step,

I can't remember if I cried
When I finally passed mile twenty-five
But something ached me deep inside,
The day, I almost, died.
So...

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Did you get your training done?
And do you have faith in Hal Higdon?
When he says how far to go.
Or do you believe in Galloway?
Can walking save your Nike soles?
And can you teach me how to run real slow?

Well I know that you had fun at Crim
Cuz I saw you runnin’ out with Jim.
You both duct taped your shoes
And I dug those donuts and booze.

The Freep marathon almost made me chuck
Lisa's and my marathon time sure did suck
But I knew that I had pressed my luck,
The day, I almost, died.
I started singin’…

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Now for ten years I ran on my own
And long runs used to make me moan
But that’s not how Club members should be,
When Argenta said "Do Goofy, you too!"
In costumes borrowed from SiraGU
I thought “no way that they will get me.”

Oh but soon I let my defenses down,
Might be fun to run in a crown
The entry form was sent;
The money had been spent.

And while John imagined him a star,
The run club practiced near and far
And we sang parodies in the bar,
The day, I almost, died.
We were singin’…

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Hi ho, hi ho, in a freezing cold snow
The runners flew off from Detroit Metro,
Packing shots and drinking fast.
Landed in Florida at last.
The hotel was not very high class
The décor was real corny and a bit crass.

Now the first night there was quite a blast
While Lisa played Guitar Hero fast.
We all stayed up real late
Oh but we all knew it was fate.

Friday to the Expo we all went
The women spent and spent and spent.
We were ready for the event,
The day, I almost, died.
We started singin’…

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Oh at the half we all ran one pace,
All dressed up in crowns and in lace
Played to the crowd at every curve.
So come on, Mike had to go, Mike was caught,
Again he walked in on a girl on the pot
She screamed “get away from me you perv!”

Oh and as we did the marathon,
Running with pirate costumes on,
No photo op was passed
Everyone had a blast.

And as the temp tried to climb with all its might
We posed and kept our spirits bright
I saw Keuten laughing with delight,
The day, I almost, died.
We were singin’…

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


We met a girl with an iguana
She’d take our picture if we’d wanna
But we had to play dead on the ground.
We hung out at the Jellyrolls
Where we could drink and rest our soles
It started with one, two, then up to nine rounds.

And in the morn’ our foreheads screamed,
“Breakfast!” we cried, of pancakes we dreamed.
But good food?  We had no luck,
The IHOP cook sure did suck.

And the three medals we admire most,
The Goofy, Donald, and Mickey Mouse,
Around our necks, no need to boast,
The day, I almost, died.
And we were singin’…

Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.

We were singin’…
Bye, bye my dumb marathon pride
Paid a big fee to do Disney but my ego was fried
The running club was pounding whiskey and rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.


====================================

Original Version

American Pie
by Don McLean


A long, long time ago I can still remember how that music used to make me smile
And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make those people dance
And maybe they'd be happy for a while.

But February made me shiver
With every paper I delivered,
Bad news on the door step,
I couldn't take one more step,

I can't remember if I cried
When I read about his widowed bride
But something touched me deep inside,
The day, the music, died.
So...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Did you write the book of love
And do you have faith in God above,
If the bible tells you so.
And do you believe in rock 'n' roll?
Can music save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me how to dance real slow?

Well I know that you're in love with him
Cuz I saw you dancin' in the gym.
You both kicked off your shoes
And I dig those rhythm and blues.

I was a lonely teenage bronkin' buck
With a pink carnation and a pick up truck
But I knew I was out of luck,
The day, the music, died.
I started singin...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Now for ten years we've been on our own
And moss grows fat on a rollin stone
But that's not how it used to be,
When the jester sang for the king and queen
In a coat he borrowed from James Dean
And a voice that came from you and me.

Oh and while the king was looking down,
The jester stole his thorny crown
The courtroom was adjourned;
No verdict was returned.

And while Lennon read a book on Marx,
The quartet practiced in the park
And we sang dirges in the dark,
The day, the music, died.
We were singin'...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Helter Skelter in a summer swelter
The birds flew off with a fallout shelter,
Eight miles high and fallin' fast.
It landed foul on the grass.
The players tried for a forward pass
With the jester on the sidelines in a cast.

Now the half-time air was sweet perfume
While the sergeants played a marching tune.
We all got up to dance
Oh but we never got the chance.

As the players tried to take the field
The marching band refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed,
the day, the music, died?
We started singin'...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


Oh and there we were all in one place,
A generation lost in space
With no time left to start again.
So come on, Jack be nimble, Jack be quick.
Jack Flash sat on a candlestick
Because fire is the devils only friend.

Oh and as I watched him on the stage,
My hands were clinched in fists of rage,
No angel born in hell
Could break that Satan's spell.

And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite
I saw Satan laughing with delight,
The day, the music, died.
He was singin'...
 
Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.


I met a girl who sang the blues
And I asked her for some happy news
But she just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the sacred store
Where I'd heard the music years before
But the man there said the music wouldn't play.

And in the streets the children screamed,
The lovers cried, and the poets dreamed.
But not a word was spoken,
The church bells all were broken.

And the three men I admire most,
The Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost,
They caught the last train for the coast,
The day, the music, died.
And they were singin'...

Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin this will be the day that I die.
This will be the day that I die.

They were singin'...
Bye, bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
Them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey 'n' rye
Singin' this will be the day that I die.